A small blue crab. Rotom, one of my favorite pokemon :)

WELCOME ABOARD

A toolbox.ToolboxThe Archive of Our Own logo.AO3A guestbook.GuestbookA small smiling catFriends :)The triforce!cringeass

WHAT'S NEW

  • 11/18/2023: Completely tore down how my website used to look. Time to rebuild it from scratch! All I've got right now is the crab that spins really fast when you hover over him.
  • 11/19/2023: Updated the navbar with icons. Unfortunately, half the links are still broken. That's next on my list. Worked out some graphic placement and custom fonts.
  • 11/21/2023: Fixed all the graphics so they render OK on mobile, too. Updated this box so it doesn't keep infinitely expanding and instead has a scrollbar. Nice!
A little orange fishie!
Transgender Pride Flag Aromantic and Asexual Pride Flags This website is DOLPHIN SAFE To err is human. To ARR is pirate. An anchor.

A pixel banner displaying the Earth. It reads; WORLD WIDE WEB.

How's it going?

I'm CAPTAIN (or CPTN, if you prefer). I'm just Some Guy who likes writing fanfiction, studying marine biology, and talking way too much about ships (both kinds).

Welcome to my little corner of the world wide web. I've been doing my best to make it a decent home :). Feel free to stay as long as you like!

Greely from Animal JamPIRATE'S LIFE FOR ME!
I like fish :)
Shark Lover!

JUST SOME STUFF

CAPTAIN'S GOD AWFUL MOVIES

Sometimes you just need a REALLY BAD movie to send to your friends, or watch eight times in a row with eight different people. I get you. I've GOT you.

Aladin (1992). What the fuck can I say about this. I found it on accident with my friend and we spent a completely insane half hour skimming through it. What is it? Where did it come from? Force your friends to watch it.

Ratatoing. I've seen this one eight times. Once was enough. It's about forty-five minutes long, but feels like it's three hours. I kept showing it to people like; "Have you seen this movie? It's awful." And they'd go "Oh, no, I haven't, let's watch it!" so I'd have to watch the damn thing AGAIN. It's seared into the synapses of my brain. If you're going to watch it, save yourself and only do it once.

A candle.

PILL TASTE REVIEWS

Picture this; you need to take your medicine (whether it be ibuproufen or prozac or whatever). Instead of swallowing the pill, you put it in your mouth and crunch it... like hard candy.

Yep. That's what I do. Trust me, I've tried every trick in the book to get pills to go down the normal way-- none of it works. My throat just closes off. So instead I get the pleasure of chewing every pill I swallow, and you get the privilege of seeing what I think about how they all taste.

IBUPROUFEN

Actually. This one sucks. I got used to the taste of prozac and now ibuproufen just tastes like... nothing. But like, a palpable nothing. Gag me. Can't get it down fast enough.

PROZAC

This one's an acquired taste, I'll have to admit. Kinda bitter when it gets stuck in your teeth. but when you get adjusted to how it tastes it's really not too bad! Best if you eat something right after it (like bread or some other grain product).

GENERIC MIGRAINE RELIEF

God awful. Fucking disgusting. Hard outer shell that crunches twice when you bite through it and absolutely triggers your gag reflex. Have water on hand and swallow fast. Leaves the faint aftertaste of chlorine after you brush your teeth, which is admittedly not bad. Does its job though, so I can't complain.

A candle.